4 Realizations to Help You Stop Expecting Too Much From Others

4 Realizations to Help You Stop Expecting Too Much From Others

It can be difficult to cope when you feel let down by others. It is an unpleasant feeling. 

You might feel that people around you don't like you enough to care and know what you expect from them. You feel like they don't bother to get to know you better. You end up feeling let down by them. 

But more often than not, these 'let downs' are due to your own fault. It is because when you expect too much from people around you, you end up feeling disappointed when they don't act exactly the way you imagined. 

You need to make sure that you are not placing too many unrealistic expectations on others, be it knowingly or unknowingly. Take responsibility for yourself and your own happiness without expecting too much from others.

Here 4 realizations to help you stop expecting too much from others:

1. Everybody has different perceptions about the things around us. 

Personal experiences and a distinct understanding of life affects the way a person thinks or behaves around everyone. The way you react to a particular situation might be different from how another person reacts to it. 

Their way of managing their life might be different from how you go about your life. Their perspective and interpretation of a particular issue could be different from yours. 

When you feel your expectations are not met by a particular person, understand that they have different perspectives and different approaches to life and it is okay if they are not similar to yours.

Everybody has their own opinions and they have the right to stand by it. You might not always agree to it or you might not like the way they lead their life or handle their relationships but you have to respect it. 

2. People are bad at reading minds. 

Even if you think a person is really close to you and they must know you really well, a lot of times they still won't just automatically know what you are thinking or what you want. 

It is simply not always that easy to figure out what another person is expecting from you. 

People around you won't know what you are thinking or feeling if you don't communicate it to them. When you expect someone to do something for you or act in a certain way, the message just doesn't reach the other person magicallyIf you want them to understand your point of view, tell them directly. 

That way, at least you'll know that they have understood what you want and then it is up to them how they want to react. 

Instead, if you just expect them to know what you are thinking, you will be really disappointed when they don't act a certain way. So just be open and clearly let them know about your needs and expectations.

3. Your expectations may not always align with those of others around you. 

Sometimes, you might be willing to do so much for others and end up expecting the same level of dedication from them as well. However, things don't always happen the way you want. 

You might be willing to do something extraordinary for others around you because that's how you are, but people might think differently. Doing someone a favor might be a big deal for you, but the same thing might be really not a big deal to somebody else. 

Some people are just more giving than others. They selflessly like to do things for other people, but others might not be so much like them. 

4. You only have control over your thoughts and actions, nobody else’s. 

Most expectations are futile and unrealistic because they are beliefs in your mind of how things and people should be. And so they are not realized because you have no control over how other people act.

You don't have any control over anybody else except yourself. 

You can't blame others for your happiness or sadness. Doing so will only frustrate you more. Your expectations will not always be met and you need to accept that. You have to help yourself. 

Only then you’ll be happier and won’t get disappointed by expecting too much from others. 

Also, don't wait for people to fulfill your expectations, but be appreciative when they actually do. Similarly, if you want to do something for other people, do it without expecting anything in return. Do it because if it makes you happy and if you truly want to help them. 


What do you think? How can a person set realistic expectations of themselves and of others around them? Share with me in the comments below.

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if you found this article helpful, don't forget to share it.

Comments

  1. Once again, very wise advice!! I love “you can only control yourself.” It would be great if we could all respect one another’s boundaries, and just “stay on our own lanes,” the world would be a different place. We allow our emotions to rule our lives, and that gets me into trouble! I have to look at the facts about a situation, and not just go by how I feel, all the time.

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    1. Absolutely! You spoke my mind. Sometimes we get carried away by our emotions and it becomes kinda difficult to deal with the people in our lives. We need to keep a check on our negative emotions and actively work on improving ourselves.
      I'm really glad you liked this post Rebecca! It is always a delight to interact with you. :D

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